You know those days where you sit by yourself and you analyze life? Figure out that you are doing EVERYTHING wrong, and you just want to change everything? That's the point I am in right now. I just wish I could change so much about my life, I want to be the happy person I was a couple years ago, even last year. I am honestly, scared. I am scared of being nineteen. I don't want to be this old, I feel like with the age comes responsibility and I don't want to be responsible or accountable yet. There is so much that I want to change about myself before its too late, before I go down the wrong path even more. I want to get out of this gray area I am living in.. I know the difference between right and wrong, but sometimes, I just don't care. I justify what I do, honestly, what I do isn't bad or illegal, but I feel like if others knew I did it they would be disappointed. I am caring too much about what others think of me, I hate it!
So my plan is to make a note card confession, way soon, yeah? I think it is the perfect therapy for me! I think it will make me strong, or at least help me pretend I'm strong.(;
On a lighter note, I get to see my best friend tomorrow!!! YEAAAH! I freaking can't wait, I love that girl so freaking much! She is the apple to my pie, the straw to my berry, the smoke to my high annd all the other things that sound cool(:
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