Two Peas In A Pod.

So I have a couple things to say. Things that weren't on my list, but are kind of bothering me.

Dear you:
I can't tell you how much I miss you. We used to have so much fun together, laughing uncontrollably (sketti). Now, we honestly never talk anymore, unless I text you and say I miss and love you. I find myself waiting, daily, for you to send me a message or something showing that you miss me, but it never happens. I felt like we were so close, 'two peas in a pod' you always said, but now, I don't remember the last time I talked to you. I constantly find myself reaching under my bed to read all those little notes and letters you wrote me. It hurts, because you were the only person I have ever feel like I fully trusted. I told you everything there was to know about me, everything. And as much as I tell myself that all my secrets aren't the reason you don't talk to me, I can't make myself believe it. I know I was/am a lot to handle, but you have done what everyone else in my life has, you abandoned me. As I sit here and write this, I feel nothing but sadness. You were like a mom to me for many years. I had the best relationship with you, ever. You got me to change so much about myself, so much. I honestly think that if it weren't for you I would still be cutting, and I would still be the girl with walls so big that no one could get in. I am so grateful that you helped me break my walls down, so grateful, but at the same time it makes me loathe you. You broke my walls down and then left me. I don't trust anyone like I trust you, never have and probably never will. I have always had this bond with you, that I could never explain.  I remember the first time I actually sat down and talked to you. You were sitting with a room full of people and you asked me if I was okay. I said yes and walked away. I wasn't, something happened to me. I went to the other person involved and asked if she'd told you what happened and she said, "yes, she asked about you and I knew you guys got along well." I wanted to cry, I couldn't believe she told you my secret. Before that night, you were just like a friend to me. We talked about all the good, and left it at that, but that night when you ended up driving me home, and I ended up telling you things I have never told another human being in my life, you became my second mommy. I remember that night like it was yesterday. I hope this distance didn't make you hate me or be disappointed in me, because that would kill me. You are the only person that I truly, truly care what they think of me. I know you have a family to take care of, but I just miss what we used to be. I know we will probably never be the same again, and I am so sad that I pushed you away all the times you tried. This distance between us is mostly because of me, but I just wish that one day, you'll text me first. That one day, you'll care about me again. That one day, we'll talk like old times.
Sincerely,
Brittany<3